The Big 10 000... Thought of Moving On...

It was noted by my Mother recently that my blog had notched up 10 000 views, and should I perhaps celebrate in some way? The thing to do would be to identify that 10 000^th hit and ship out a gho or a kira to the lucky loyal reader, but on the one hand, it's impossible to find that information, and on the other, well, it's all a bit silly really.

But this is worth a small celebration. Why? Because it's called 'The Bhutanical Adventures of...', and this year has been just about the grandest adventure of my life so far. Some people back home thought I was mad to even consider it, and they weren't afraid to tell me so. My previous boss who I respect and have much affection for didn't speak to me for days. I guess he felt a little let down by my jumping ship. He worked his way back into dialogue with laconic reminders that I'd be eating with one hand and wiping my backside with the other. Well, he was right, and I'm sure I sometimes forget which hand is which.

My Mother thought I was a bit bonkers too. I'd finally carved myself a niche out of something that vaguely resembled comfort and security – good job, a car, almost a house, healthy hearty hobbies, good friends... “Why now?” Reasonable question, not easy to answer, but I could steal Jonas Jonassan's words for a simple and honest reply... “I think that if you've once asked yourself: 'Should I...' then the answer should be: 'Yes!' Otherwise, how would you ever know if you shouldn't?” Well said. My explanation was somewhat more long-winded and took place in The Full Moon in Bristol over a few pints of good ale (oh for a good ale). Ten minutes later, I think she understood. 3 weeks in Bhutan and I'm pretty sure it all made sense. Perhaps.

By my tone, it's perfectly obvious that I'm thinking now about an ending. I've not renewed my contract at Pakshikha MSS. I could easily have done so. I could easily have stayed here indefinitely, which is perhaps why I'm not staying here another year. Whenever a whiff of permanence arises in circumstances, it's good to have a quiet word with oneself. I'm not a Buddhist, but they are right on the moneybutton with their take on entropy – nothing lasts forever... life, love, pain, hunger, even architecture and place. You obviously never step into the same river twice, everything certainly changes, clinging is suffering and decay, but man oh man, moving on can be a bit brutal too. With only one life (as far as I am aware off), it seems that as long as the next thing is a different thing, then nothing is lost.

But I have made family here, and it's going to be really hard to leave the kids downstairs, with their constant 'what is this?', 'Mr Davidsir!', 'Nga-gi' and their general all-round cuteness and affection. The same goes for their wonderful mother Am-Kingha and their fun-time-frankie father, ST. I struggled with the social life for a while here – a lot of drinking goes on - but now I have a good set of mates around me and I'll miss them. The school kids are pretty much all wonderful – there's hardly a bad egg among them, and its great fun teaching them now that they've opened up a bit more and don't just sit in silence staring at me. As a teacher, you always leave a cohort behind. There's always an exam class at a vital stage that you feel bad for leaving, but it's impossible to avoid it by any other means than staying put. I'm not a staying-putter.

In school, I've achieved more than I ever thought I would, primarily because the school is still finding its feet in its first full year, so more opportunities present themselves than is reasonable. The first half of the year really was just too much, but now I know that I can handle 33 periods a week, Head of Science, Mentor Teacher, Timetabler, Results Coordinator, Literary in Charge and all the rest of it without collapsing in a burnt out heap of cinders (although I think that's what happened to me in the mid-term break).

In the second half of the year my timetable dropped back to normal but I had the rather unexpected opportunity to try living with chronic pain out for size, something I've never had the chance to do before. I wouldn't say it was fun, but I think it will be worth it afterwards (still with me I'm afraid, like a crummy friend). Oh and I had a boil! On my thigh. Now that was worth every wince and whine, just for the sheer medievalness of it. I was astounded when they pulled out the creamy nob to reveal a hole in my leg about the size of a twenty-pence piece and as deep as a finger nail, rimmed by raw gummy flesh. I laughed maniacally all the way through the procedure, much to the amusement of the nurse who clearly thought I was unhinged. I'm not a masochist, but boy did that make me laugh.

Where was I? Endings. So every morning I look out my window and find it hard to believe that I made this decision, that my choices led me to such an outstandingly beautiful place and such a marvellous experience. The prayer flags flutter in the foreground and behind them the mountains just fall away into the valley and rise up again to broccoli jungle peaks. The woods are always whirring with funny noises. The air is sweet and crisp. The autumnal sky is clear and full of stars, quite unlike the summer fug. My walk to school takes me through the forest. My feet crunch on gravel as I liberally scatter 'Kuzoozangpo la's to the villagers I pass on the way. At this time of year, Pakshikha is simply stunning. It always will be at this time of year, whether I'm here or not. Not as the case will be.

Of course, Thimphu is just 4 hours away, and now I've got a decent circle of friends there. I've finally started playing out - a few weeks ago I got up on the stage in Mojo Park and after 2 songs the house band joined me and we jammed for an hour or two. Definitely going back there! If time permits, I've also arranged to take some school kids into the studio to record a half hour live music show. When I get decent internet I'll put the rough version of the Pakshikha Anthem I wrote in a fit of silliness.

I will keep plugging away at trying to find the right job for me here next year, but despite encouraging noises from encouraging places, nothing concrete has yet materialised. So, Thailand for Christmas and possible Kerala in January to finish the two novels once and for all, followed by some trekking, either in Nepal where some voluntary work may be tagged on, or back in Bhutan if I can convince myself (and my irksome body) to do the Snowman trek. And then... home? Back to Bhutan as a UN Volunteer with BCMD, As a lecturer in Royal Thimphu College. Or a dream job in the Royal Education Council? China? Africa? Kazakhstan?? As long as its different. And one good aspect of the 'same river twice' idea is that you just can't lose - even going home will be an adventure!