Heroic Defeat... better than a Victory???

The Epic Inter-School Staff Football Tournament

7 schools. 2 leagues, with winners and runners up progressing to semi-finals. At the outset, I put our chances on a par with Greece in that Euro championship they won. It was possible, but far from expected. And on the eve of England's inevitable departure from Euro 2012 on penalties (if we get that far), this small affair in a school in rural Bhutan followed a script that... well.. we'll see... here we go, game by game...

Game 1 – Pakshikha MSS vs Kamji

Kamji were the whipping boys, the goal difference accumulators for the other teams. We won 7-3. I had the pleasure watching another free kick go in off the underside of the crossbar, the second in two games.

Game 2 – Pakshikha MSS vs Gedu School

This was our nemesis team from the previous games. We went in quietly confident, but by half time we were 3-0 down and playing awful. Everyone was playing as if they had no heart, no desire (like England in the last World Cup), so there was no running and no tackling, and any amount of organisational shouting was wasted energy. As we sat gloomily taking on water, various strategy changes were suggested and debated. I listened quietly and then invoked the spirit of a former captain of mine, Mr David Gamble of the illustrious AFC Bohemia, Bristol Downs League. 

Many-a-times our humble team had found ourselves in the same shoddy position and Mr Gamble, disregarding strategic debate would give us a brutally honest account of ourselves, lift us up by the collars and throw us back onto the pitch with just enough fire in our bellies to at least salvage pride, win or lose. I took it upon myself to take this role and gave a general rollicking about heartlessness. 

Off we marched for the second half, and within five minutes, I was taken down about 35 yards out. I placed the ball down. The wall settled itself. The ref blew the whistle. I stared that little ball down until it shrivelled slightly beneath my gaze and then... boom! In off the cross bar again! 3 in 3 games! Crazytimes! The team rallied and we won the second half 3-0, giving us a much-needed draw that felt like a victory and was celebrated as such with much dancing and merriment on the bus home.

Unexpected bonus time... the referee happened to be the full-back for the Bhutan national side, recently returned from a match against Afghanistan. He complimented me on my play, took my number and said he'd recommend me to his club manager in Thimphu, suggesting I go for a trial. Unexpected. Bonus. I humbly and with much anticipation await the call.

Game 3 – Pakshikha MSS vs Gedu College

Going into this game we knew we needed a draw to get into the knock-out stages. We started in the same fashion as we started the previous game – shoddily and without heart. At half time we were 2-0 down again. I couldn't see a way back. They weren't particularly good, but we were shonky. However, we managed to pull one back with some good play from our talisman forward - Amber (10 goals in 4 games). Gedu's heads went down, and then we got a stroke of luck. I lobbed in a hopeful cross and the keeper flapped at it, dropped it and it landed on Mr Gembo's chest. He couldn't miss. 2-2. We're going through! Sit back, defend. Hold it. NO! Burst forward and get fouled. 

This freekick was a few feet from the side-line, perhaps 20 feet from the half way line, too far to have a punt on goal. The Principal had just turned up to support us. He was on his feet. 'Direct', everyone said to me. So I just ran up to that ball and thumped it as best I could... in off the underside of the crossbar again! 4 freekicks in 4 games! Why didn't they ever let me take free kicks at Bohemia? Now... for the semi-final...

Game 4 – Pakshikha MSS vs Wangchu HSS (Semi-final)

We should have won. Then again, we shouldn't have won. The problem – we were all tired out having had no rest day, so we started the game with paining legs, whereas they didn't. But we started the game with surprising assurance, cruising into a 2-0 lead that we held until half time. I felt uneasy though. When we won a freekick at the end of the half, the small crowd that had gathered in the amphitheatre-style ground were chanting 'direct' in unison, expectations running high. I gave it my usual curly thump, and it struck the underside of the crossbar again... but...  it didn't go in. My lucky streak of freekicks was at an end. To make matters worse it landed at the feet of the talismanic Amber, and somehow mis-hit it into the arms of the keeper. 

The second half saw them Wangchu draw level – extra time. No goals. Penalties. Let's put this in context... I am English. I'm in the semi-finals of a football tournament. What chance do I have?

The Semi-final Penalty Shoot-out

It was decided that I would go first. I duly pinned my eyes to the bottom right of the goal, set my body to the same direction and then turned my foot and sent it left and it went in. I wanted to go back to my team to tell them the keeper was falling for the simplest tricks in the book, but the ref made the kickers go to the sideline. Not sure why. Anyway, we missed every other penalty we took. Whoops! And went crashing out in a heroic defeat, questions of matching scheduling lingering over our miserable exit... if only we'd had a rest day like they did? If only the open goal had been scored? If the freekick had been a millimetre lower?

Eyes to the Future...

So the team was somewhat dejected. My cheery reaction must have seemed odd. I tried to explain that it was in part due to habituation – the English cope much better with heroic defeat than with victory in football.  


The despondency soon lifted and we celebrated our exit in fine style. After all, we hadn't expected much and had progressed undefeated from the group! The team we lost to went on to win the tournament with a 1-0 victory in the final. I can't help thinking we would have graced the final with a few more goals and touch more intrigue, but it was never to be. All we have to show for it is our destroyed but slowly healing legs, but we'll be back...

Next time eh?

In the meantime, I eagerly await my call up to the big time! ;-)


Who would have thought there'd be so much football for me in Bhutan?